The stories in my head I hope we can all act out one day in a play and then get pasta after

Aliya: Mom can we chat?

Me: Sure!  Is this about the awesome dinner I made last night? Because they say wine burns off and...

Aliya: Um...no...while it was amazing, I was wanting to talk about something else.  Something a little closer to your heart.

Me:  Is this an intervention to ask me stop watching Malcolm in the Middle?  Because I'm in way too deep now and I've connected with the characters on a personal level and...

Aliya: Mom...no...it's the way you sort of sometimes make up things we say on your blog. 

Me:  *blink. blink.*

Aliya:  Okay, now I know that it's shocking, it's just that we've noticed that you sometimes add a word here or there to spice it up and it's...annoying.

Me:  I have no idea what you're talking about.

Aliya:  Like this.  We're not actually having this conversation right now.  You're making it up. 

Me:  Okay, in my defense, sometimes you use a weird word in real life and I have to put in a...hmmm...let's just say, a word that flows better.

Abraham Lincoln:  I completely agree.  It has to flow.

Aliya:  Seriously?!  Now you have Abe Lincoln in here? 

Me:  Don't discount him.  He's very smart.

Aliya: Okay, mom, but sometimes it's embarrassing the stories you decide to tell and you really need to ask us first.  Stop letting him show his ax to me.  He wasn't really a vampire hunter you know.

Me:  Or was he?  One of life's great mysteries.

Aliya:  No!  Not a mystery at all!  That was a fake book, not real, he cannot even be here right now.

Me:  *whispering*  I believe you're here Abe.

Abe:  Her skin is awfully white...

Aliya:  Come over here and so help me....

Me:  Okay you two, Abe put the ax away, Aliya I think the real issue here is that you want to hunt vampires too and you feel left out.

Aliya:  What?  No.  That doesn't even make sense.  THIS.  This is what I'm talking about.  Just making up random crap and not making sense and sometimes you talk about poop mom.  On your blog.  That's just weird.

Me:  You know who doesn't poop?  Vampires.

Abe:  Totally!  High five! 

Aliya:  Abraham Lincoln would never say 'totally' like that in a sentence and he would never high five you.  This interventions has been a fail. 

Me:  If by 'fail' you mean 'awesome'.  Because then yes, it has been a fail.  Blogging rocks.